Bootilicious...My Ass!

So I'm on campus at Durban right? So on hot days obviously I can't wear my jeans, it'll stick to me! so on the odd boiler day I wear shorts...and DAMN It sucked!

Ok ok I get it you want to stare but really now? Stare EVERYTIME you see me? Even the LECTURERS were staring! Dirty Old Men....

On the plus side I know that if I ever want or need an extenstion for an assignment or something I just have to make sure I wear shorts when I ask...

But seriously...it's not like I'm in shape or something...stop making comments about my so-called "sexy" legs and get an eye test...really..like, now....Have you never seen a girl in your life before? Or shorts? Or actual legs? I mean come on, there are girls on campus wearing minnier-than-micro dresses, shorts, hot shorts or watever...basically like bikini bottoms, and yet you stare at me. and then your girlfriend who's actually WITH you must give evil-eye...*sigh*

I blame society. Society and Media. If it wasn't for you people, there wouldn't be this "perfect body" image that you impose on the world. Everyone is their own size and you should respect that, not bombard people with images of skinny girls who are supposedly the best looking. I realised that today while everyone was staring. skinny girl will wear nothing thats ok they've got close-to-nothing to show anyway...but when a plus-size shows up in close to nothing it's thought to be ugly or wierd. say it with me now, WTF??

But in any case the damage is done...because of the media and celebrities, skinny is the way apparently. These Durban girls will practically dress up in childrens clothes to actually fit them..while the plus size ones will try to squeeze in the smallest they find. I don't get it, I really don't.
 But why? Because of media...The skinny girls try to dress up and show off that they fit in with the image of society while the plus girls go on diet after diet, smoke pack after pack and wear the tightest possible to suck everything in...if that doesn't show you how fcuked up society is, there's something wrong with you...

I'm not skinny. I'm not plus. I like to think I'm in the middle. you can judge for yourself but my point is this. If you're comfortable in what you wear ok. But always remeber that whatever size you are it doesn't matter. Your body is YOUR body. No one else has to deal with it, clothe it, feed it, etc. so don't bother to listen to anyone about it. Media or otherwise.

My motherr always tells me I need to diet (AS IF!) but my way of thinking is simple and clear. It's my body. I'm living with it, dealing with it and happy with it. as long as those three things remain true it's none of your business what size or shape it is. It's my own thing...

You're such a fcuking hypocrite!

I cannot even begin to explain....

Ok...deep breath...In...Out...
In...Out...
IN...OUT...

WOOOOOOOOOOOOSSSSSSSSSSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH.....

Yarrr. What a bitch.

Ok so I know I'm not supposed to use language and fasting and all but seriously some people just KNOW how to make my blood boil.

And on top of that these people wont stop staring. WHAT are you staring at? Yes, you...random guy next to me that thinks I don't know you're reading...WHAT??

I've been on campus for 6 months..haven't you seen me enough times? why must you STARE!

Jeez I hate it.it makes me feel self-conscious when people stare. And I hate the way guys stare at me...and then the girls will stare because the guys stare and then its just one big stareathon..What is it, stare at Kathy day?

Grrrrrr.....

But back to my ORIGINAL reason for being pissed off. I cannot stress enough how I HATE fake people but users are wose. We've all been there. Used someone or gotten used. You remember how it felt? Yet you do the same thing to someone else...bitch.

And the worse part? You're fake as well! As if I need more reason to be pissed. Now you can smile and act like we close yet you turn the other way when you're with someone else but the point is it's gonna get done to you. You can practice and preach and be fake all you want but no one falls for that sweet, innocent bullshit. Really now....

Maybe when I'm in a better mood I'll post something decent...

Glass Heart...

Have you ever had that feeling that the next thing could set you off? No matter what or who, you're just emotional with no idea why..

Maybe it feels like you're falling apart...and putting yourself together is just out of the question...

But, how do you cope? What do you do when you don't know what to do?

Your hearts like glass..to fragile..too easily broken..so you don't love. Don't let anyone in. Don't care. If you do all thats going to happen is that the little glass heart that loves so much will be shattered and no one picks up broken pieces.

You say that I'm messing with your head? Get out of mine!

But all that's left to do is be me. Why should I care what other people think? I am who I am and who I wanna be...they don't accept it, it's their own thing.

It's not worth being a clone, copying and living up to what's expected of you. If it's what you want then sure be a drone..

Me? I'm Queen Bitch, baby! and nothing you'll do or say will change my mind or how I feel. I always have and always will be me. I'm different. I'm original. Screw the rest of you carbon copies.

Won't be a good wife? Don't need a husband. Won't be a good mother? Kids are spoilt brats anyways. Going to die young? Perfect...I'll be young forever ;)

Heartbreaker

I don’t know what to post…usually I have something good to write about…but I don’t know whether to be happy or sad, calm or mad. Heartbreak is an interesting thing...some people get through it easily and others take more time. Ironically enough I was listening to a song that happens to be one of my favourites and I agree. So What? So what if it’s over? So what if you’re gone? So what?

P!nk has always been a favourite artist of mine and most of her songs seem to have meaning to me. This one in particular appeals to my mood today. She wrote it and so it helped her come to terms with her divorce. And you know what? She’s absolutely right. So what? One minute they were one of the most world-wide seemingly “perfect” couples the nest BAM! Divorce... Now don’t get me wrong it’s a process. Accepting the fact that it’s the end and then coming to terms with it and moving on never easy. But everyone can do it. Like nursing a wound. You clean it out, disinfect it cover it up and leave it…still treat it once in a while but leave it. It heals itself over time. Same as divorce. Same as death. Same as heartbreak. One process, multiple situations. I don’t think it works for me though

Sure I’ll heal but someone who does that betrays your trust. And trust is like a mirror, you can fix it if its broken, but you’ll still see the cracks in that mothafcukaz reflection. So yeah sure I’ll get over it. I move on. But don’t expect me to be your “friend” you fcuk up you fcuk up for good. No such as second chances. I don’t make the same mistake twice. My heart just won’t let me.

But I admire the way she handled her divorce. P!nk is the only one who can write a song after her divorce completely over her husband, can write a song insulting him and lowering meaning of their marriage, but can still get him in the music video and remain on “good” terms with him. Even AFTER the song claims that he’s a tool and she doesn’t need him! =P

Gotta admire her…Rest of you are haterz =D